13 August 2008

Guilty Pleasures

The results of the 2008 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction contest are in! The contest, named for the author who penned the immortal line "It was a dark and stormy night..." is to write the opening line of the worst possible novel. This year has some truly stunningly bad sentences, such as:

"Die, commie pigs!" grunted Sergeant "Rocky" Steele through his cigar stub as he
machine-gunned the North Korean farm animals.


Joanne watched her fellow passengers - a wizened man reading about alchemy; an
oversized bearded man-child; a haunted, bespectacled young man with a scar; and a gaggle of private school children who chatted ceaselessly about Latin and flying around the hockey pitch and the two-faced teacher who they thought was a witch - there was a story here, she decided.

and the rather risque:

She had the kind of body that made a man want to have sex with her.

If you like bad writing= and who doesn't?- then drop by and enjoy. It's a great way to kill time for people who feel their time is better off dead.

No comments: