"It Was a Dark and Stormy Night..."

If you know who wrote the above immortal phrase,- and no, it was not Snoopy- then chances are you know about the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest. The challenge is to write the opening line to what would be the worst novel ever written, and ever year writers rise (or perhaps sink) to the challenge and come up with hilariously bad openings. This year's results are now out. Go. Enjoy.